9Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Buzz Off!

My life isn't a tabloid. I just want my privacy. Stop gossiping about me. Page 3, Winston does this... Page 12, Winston is that... Page 45, Winston is whatever!

I just realized that my life's story has been a lie. I reckon 3/4 of my poly friends don't even know who I really am. They only see what they hear =| I've heard it all, I'm a fake, I'm a flirt, I'm gay, I'm a playboy, I'm a toyboy, etc. I have ears la, I'm not AS BLUR a you all think. Stop mouthing me behind my back.

I can't seem to trust anyone. Anyway, I don't mean alot to them, or maybe, I just wasn't good enough. Poly was sort of a bitter sweet story. I've had my wonderful moments, real friendships that I forged, friendships I wouldn't sacrifice, but there were friendships that I just didn't do enough, friendships that I let drown. I have many friends, all merely acquaintances. It's sad, cause all my conversations were just on the surface, nothing further than an inch. No one wanted to share more with me, because I couldn't be trusted or I was weird, posessing ulterior motives. I will never know. I don't want to know.

It's my fault I guess. I should have tried harder. From my classmates, school mates, society, ambassadors and fellow np'ians who know of my (negative) exploits... I shouldn't have been a mystery to everyone. I should have been more transparent and honest. Yea.

Well, new chapter of my life, I'll leave behind an experience I've learnt alot from. True friends are far from few, cherish them. Jerks and other whatnots, whatever.

Striving on for a new and better tomorrow.
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